As a father and single parent, I have never had a connection with Father’s Day and really never understood why until this past year. Father’s Day, like many other things in our society, has become commercialized and most families have lost the true essence of that day. I came to a realization early on that being a father is a gift, one that should be enjoyed every day and in all ways.
A day as a father means playing many roles:
- an educator
- a mentor
- a therapist
- a disciplinarian
- a tutor
- a mediator
- a friend
- a confidant
- a doctor
- a coach
- a motivational speaker
- a spectator
- a spiritual leader
- a good listener
- and always provide hope when all else seems to have been lost
There are times when my children express anger and hatred for certain decisions I make, but later they confess that they love me for doing the right thing. They have even expressed their gratitude towards me for being there for them in their time of need and for not being there for the times they needed their space. The list goes on and on, but each role brought me a strong sense of satisfaction, as a father and friend.
There are many hats we wear as parents, some more difficult than others. The gratification of our efforts come in the form of the results of our actions with our children. A good teacher always learns from his students and none could be greater than those lessons taught by our children and so, I share with you the events that unfolded this past Father’s Day.
It was early Sunday morning and I was awoken by my sons, who showered me with hugs and kisses. They proceeded to nudge me over to the center of the bed and positioned themselves on my left and right sides, as they usually do on the weekends. They were both in their usual cheerful moods, energized spirits and ready-to-go attitudes as they smiled and simultaneously called out, ”good morning dad”. I replied “good morning gentlemen…” and then asked if they knew what day it was? “It’s Sunday!” my older son stated with a grin, “why do you ask dad?” It appeared to me that my boys had forgotten that it was Father’s Day and before I could say another word, they both said, “Every day is Father’s Day, that is what you always tell us, so why should this day be any different.”
They jumped out of bed, ran out of the room, only to return moments later with cards they had made for Father’s day. They had crafted their own Father’s Day cards of which they were so proud to read and present to me as a life long memory and keep sake. They insisted I remain in bed while they prepared a special Father’s Day breakfast for me. It was toast with cream cheese, a bowl of cereal and a hot cup of tea (a five star dish in my book). They set up a beautiful place setting on the dining room table and called for my presence. We sat together and enjoyed a wonderful meal together. You see, what they did that morning, was no different to what they do on a regular basis. What I found most pleasing was the fact that they chose to give me what no television commercial could ever sell… They chose to give of themselves. That is the true essence of Father’s Day, an unselfish and personal demonstration of appreciation from our children.
It was right there and then that I realized that my children understood the true meaning of Father’s Day and at the same time, I understood my disconnect with the commercialized version of Father’s Day. The day continued in the same spirit as it began and ended on a high note of bliss.
The pleasures of fatherhood are distinctly unique, while every moment may not always be as sweet, the blossoming of our children into independent beings is a testament to our tireless efforts.
It is truly a blessed gift to be able to experience all that life has to offer with my children, and so I have learned that every day is Father’s Day.
